(From Emelious--To Silmeria {Feeling})

Feel, feel the wounds
Hold my hands cradling all the souls
And wait, wait for peace
As my love makes its way shattering

[CHORUS]
My heart, it hurts
'Cause it never catches its breath
I'm still staying when I should have left
Come to where the waters meet the shore
I'll be there
And I will stay, leaving you

(Stay) Listen to
All my dreams, love that lasts, pain that heals
And take, take your time
But move so fast, 'cause hearts move on
And this is real

[CHORUS]

This time it means something
Dreams will fall, love will spill

[ ] smoked
[ ] consumed alcohol
[ ] slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex
[x] kissed someone of the same sex
[ ] had sex
[x] had someone in your room other than family
[x] watched porn
[ ] bought porn
[ ] tried drugs

TOTAL: 4

[x] taken painkillers
[ ] taken someone else's prescription medicine
[x] lied to your parents
[x] lied to a friend
[x] snuck out of the house
[ ] done something illegal
[x] felt hurt
[x] hurt someone
[x] wished someone to die
[ ] seen someone die

TOTAL: 11

[x] missed curfew
[x] stayed out all night
[x] eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself
[ ] been to a therapist
[ ] received a ticket
[ ] been to rehab
[x] dyed your hair
[ ] been in an accident
[ ] been to a club
[x] been to a bar

TOTAL: 16

[x] been to a wild party
[ ] been to a Mardi Gras parade
[ ] drank more than three alcoholic beverages in a night
[ ] had a spring break in Florida
[ ] sniffed anything (
[x] wore black nail polish
[x] wore arm bands
[ ] wore t-shirts with band names
[x] listened to rap

TOTAL: 20

[x] dressed gothic
[x] dressed girly
[x] dressed punk
[ ] dressed grunge
[x] stole something
[ ] been too drunk to remember anything
[ ] blacked out
[ ] fainted
[ ] had a crush on a neighbor

TOTAL: 24

[x] had a crush on a friend
[x] been to a concert
[x] dry-humped someone; been dry humped
[x] been called a slut
[x] called someone a slut
[ ] installed speakers in a car
[ ] broken a mirror
[x] showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
[x] brushed your teeth with someone else's toothbrush

TOTAL: 31

[ ] considered Ludacris your favorite rapper?
[x] seen an R-rated movie
[x] cruised the mall
[x] skipped school
[x] had surgery
[x] had an injury
[ ] gone to court
[ ] walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping
[ ] caught something on fire
[x] lied about your age

TOTAL: 37

[ ] owned/rented an apartment/house
[ ] broke the law in the police's presence
[ ] made out with someone who had a GF/BF
[ ] got in trouble with the police
[x] talked to a stranger
[x] hugged a stranger
[ ] kissed a stranger
[ ] rode in the car with a stranger
[x] been harassed
[x] been verbally harassed

TOTAL: 41

[ ] met face-to-face with someone you met online
[x] stayed online for 5+ hours straight
[x] talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight
[x] watched TV for 5 hours straight
[x] been to a fair
[ ] been called a bad influence
[ ] drank and drove
[ ] prank-called someone
[x] laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex
[x] cheated on a test

TOTAL: 47

If you have 00-10 ... write [I'm a goody-goody]
If you have 11-20 ... write [I'm still a goody-goody]
If you have 21-30 ... write [I'm average]
If you have 31-40 ... write [I'm a bad kid]
If you have 41-50 ... write [I'm a very bad influence]
If you have 51-60 ... write [I'm a horrible person]
If you have 61-70 ... write [I should be in jail]
If you have 71-80 ... write [I should be dead]
If you have 81-90 ... write [I got a ticket to Hell]

Okay, so Halloween is tomorrow. Great.
I went to Wally World a couple of hours ago and got a vampire kit. So yeah. I'm gonna go trick-o-treating with Courtney, Chris, Taylor, Travis, Dale, and I think Courtney's little bro. I'm going to wear the dress for Winter Ball I bought and that pearl necklace I got with it. Also, the 'fit-to-your-teeth-with-putty' fangs and makeup and a tattoo. It's gonna look groovy.
It's been raining like fucking the gods in high heaven can't stop crying.... God. it's stupid, because I'm soaking wet even as I type this. The news people said that it's gonna overflow over the river wall if it keeps going at it like this. I'm just hoping there's nothing wrong going on in LV.
.....ugh.

I'm hoping to go to Garrett's house tomorrow too, so let's just hope and see....
I'm gonna go to Winter Ball with Taylor! (Taylor is Chris' brother and best friend. Taylor's gay. xD)
All District Choir practice was yesterday. I had a great time at the football game too. We lost to Jackson (our enemy rival school) 13 to 20. It was horrible, because we were tied to eachother at a minute before the end of the game, and Jackson just HAD to get a touchdown. ugh. Whatever. We had a blow-out season, no wins, all losses.

There's an overview of my week. See ya.

~Leandra <3
(life'sbeenabitbetterslightly)

So, here's my life from the beginning of October...

I started dating this guy, and he seemed really nice at first. He seemed to perfect, like everything I ever wanted, and he was like me (rock music, goth-ish, acts stupid but cool) in almost every way. His name was Garrett, and I seemed to fall to hard for him. And what happens when you fall? You eventually crash. But here, I crashed and burned to living Hell. He started to like this other girl named Amanda (we're friends now) and she kinda liked him too. During Homecoming he was holding hands with her, and I still don't know why he was crying (he told me that he was and wouldn't tell me why). Then I started to hang out with my only really good friends, Chris (a guy I used to like) and Taylor (Chris' brother, he's gay!) and they gave me advice: "The minute you stop searching and caring about love is gonna be the minute it finds you."
It hit me hard, because I started crying that night.
Then I met Travis. Travis plays Alto quackophone (Sax) and can play piano really well. He's shorter than me (weird, 'cause he's cute and sensitive) and likes to hug me alot. I sometimes catch him staring at me when I'm looking at Taylor or something. I think I'm starting to like him, but then again, what's to like about me when I've been rejected all my life?

Anyway, that was my October so far, and I'm gonna go to Kentucky on Friday for Quad State Orchestra Festival. I hate orchestra now. It's boring and I'm better than everyone else. D:
And I'm going to take pictures with everyone who got into All District Choir because I guess Mrs. Casey needs it. I dunno. That's my life so far. Thanks for reading, as if you care.

Thanks a bunch (fuckmylife)
~Leandra